Dear people...

... who say I'm always at the doctor. I would like to adress this issue and I will break down into points so your small minds can have a chance at understanding it.

1. This spring I went to the doctor becuase I looked as pale as a fricking ghost and could hardly make it through a day. Not normal. My hemoglobin was so low it almost qualified for a transfusing. Not okay. So yes I did see the doctor as I DID NOT WANT TO DIE!
2. Another thing this spring. My hands started to swell (edema), hurt, itched, and I couldn't feel as well or use my hands as well either. So yes, again I wanted to know why my hands are swelling as this can be a sign of a major medical issue, that and I wanted to use my hands again and not go crazy becuase they itched. Dyshidrotic excema.
3. Last year I went to the doctor. Once was becuase I woke up with all over pain(flu anyone?), was barely coherent (am I ever?), and had major chills and was crying... but lets pretend that didn't happen. So I did not go of my own free will, but I did manage to coerce my mom into just going to a clinic not the ER. (kinda a bad idea in hindsight as I think the ER might have made me feel better faster... and not wait 2hrs). So I had the flu... Still it was not my choice to go.
4. Again to go because I was sweating bullets and had a fever of 102 F, after taking an Aleve. Well that and I thought if I got their okay, they would let me go to school. No I actually go BANNED, which wasn't surprising as you could probably tell I had a fever with me practically melting.
5. Also, should I have gone to the doctor another time it would have been for an infection, bacterial, as I 1) don't have time to take weeks to get better and 2) I understand that these infections can get progressively worse and spread; therefor you should not let it get that far. WARNING: this applies to actual infections, not sniffles from allergies.
6. Also, guess who is more prone to getting respiratory infections? ME! DARN THAT ASTHMA AND ALLERGIES. (Good news: actually taking my meds for this consistently actually helps.... who woulda thunk)
7. I think we should also examine that I am now probably more healthy than a good bit of my friends and specifically those who make said stupid comments.
8. NO I DON'T go the doctor that much. This past year has only been for non-infection problems (see 1&2)
9. I admit I went to the doctor this past few months. Why you may ask. Well after working out 1 hr a day cardio, 5 days a week I was still really fatigued. I couldn't get through a day without a nap. That's not what's supposed to happen when one gets more healthy. Got that fixed. (dang gum iron won't stick!)
10. Oh, and I haven't even gone to the ER in over a year for the kidney stones or other wise. 
11. And I don't have mono.

Well since none of those people will read this blog, I guess it could just be a humorous one, or a venting one... could really be both at the same time.

PS I also think people actually like me and don't think I'm evil, a snob, lesbian, slut, whore, ect.

I think Steph loves me....

Some things that I should be worried about.....

1. I don't mind people stealing art, as long as it goes into hands that will treat it well.
2. Burning art/ripping/anything destructive is not okay.
3. Burning books is never okay.
4. Especially if they are one of a kind.
5. I would mind more if I had an accident in my car than someone else's... becuase then I've wrecked my car. Injuries take a second seat.
6. I wouldn't mind broken bones as long as theres not severe lasting handicap.
7. My head I mind very much... but somehow I think it's rather hard so we might be okay.
8. If I am paralyzing to the point I can't move my arms and legs, ect. and am there for a burden on my family, I would probably rather die. PROBABLY because it hasn't happened and you never know until your in a situation how you will act.
9. I wouldn't mind so much if for some reason I didn't go back to school and get the education to be an NP.
10. I need to stop spacing off so much, especially while walking... on a treadmill.... did you know at some point you almost stop walking?

So anyway there's that.

I rearranged all my books and bookshelves and cleaned them and got rid of a ton yesterday. I can honestly tell you I have no idea how it started, but from there it snowballed.

Food For Thought

Dying. Some people fear it, while others welcome it with open arms. Some will do anything and everything to avoid it, when others tempt it as sport. The heroes who are willing give their lives for others everyday, and sometimes they do. War lord and evil cause so much death, while medicine can give life. Technology can be used to cause great death, or to save thousands. There are some who will never stop at battling the beast for others too weak to do it themselves. But whatever the reason, whatever the cause, death is not pretty. Death can be poetic if you make it so, but to break it down can only show the indecency of it. The body shuts down as the blood stops flowing, but the cells keep on trying becuase they don't know. You will eventually decay after looking good for your last stand.  Turning into dust. Death is not something to be taken lightly, n or too seriously. But to the loved ones of the dead, to them death is the ultimate thief. Snatching the lives of their friends and family, always, it seems, before their time. It leaves a hole in your heart and a ache in your chest and in those moments death is still death. Whether it was a heroic, natural, or tragic, it still took your loved on away and that cannot be changed....

TAKE THAT people who try to romanticize things!

YAY PONIES AND RAINBOWS!

On another note I don't know what I'm going to be for Halloween and I'm attending a big party so I think it should have some effort put in. But it should be comfy, not too skimpy, not require a lot of make and preferably small or no props. Yeah I did think it through and list criteria. PS cannot be Sherlock Holmes as I 1 do not have a "detective" outfit or anything that look remotely like that. And 2 I didn't think the pipe and hat would make it if I ordered it.

I bet that scared you to death in a small way...

How to Survive the WORST storm in 70 years

1. Do not stop and take pictures of tornadoes
2. Do not stand and FILM said tornadoes
3. RUN from tornadoes
4. If you're in a trailer, don't even bother with the hiding, you will die if the tornado comes either way.
5. You shouldn't start freaking out until the tornado is seen by you, because it's tiring getting scared every time someone "sees" a tornado.
6. If you are a newscaster, I do not want to listen to you ramble on and on about this storm instead of letting me watch NCIS... Everyone else had scheduled programing...
7. You know you've lived in Tennessee long enough if every time theres a tornado warning you're like "wateva!"
8. Stay away from large structures like dams and bridges as they are already kinda on the sketchy side of being kept up... the tornado might be the final straw.

What people do instead of trying to live

 

This is from Okalhoma... picture or live? picture

Is Global Warming Worsening Hurricanes? 

evidently if it is... we don't really have anything to worry about as we'll probably be dead before it gets HORRIBLE....

 

We're doing it wrong...

Steph, if you read this.... I AM SOOOO BORED! IM DYING IN THE LIBRARY!!!!

Things you may not have known...

1. Sherlock Holmes once knocked up Watson. Let's just say John was less than pleased...
2. You know when you do those crazy spaz-attacks before you go to sleep. Often times your falling and you wake up? These are myoclonic twitches.
3. Hiccups are too.
4. Also when you lose concentration sometimes, though rarely, you can have myoclonic twitches too.
5. Cleaning one's room is always a chore.... UNLESS IT'S TO AVOID HOMEWORK!
6. Not feeding me equals me losing weight without even trying, or working out... it's pretty serious.
7. Also, sometimes I find I am too cheap to buy food... even if I'm starving.
8. Dogs are still stupid... yes they are.
9. I may be the only person who got so lost in thought making a list of' "to-do"s that I almost tripped and fell on the treadmill...
10. It's okay most times if you go the opposite direction on a one way... most people also share your aversion to having a crash and dying.
11. PS I'm not so sure this counts on the highway...
12. Death storms are very suspenseful... and boring.
13. Reading your little silly fiction books does not hardly count as reading. Sometimes you actaully have to read literature.
14. The Rubiks cube is kicking my butt.
15. Sherlock Holmes promises to kill you if you kill Watson. Go on, I dare you.. try it.
16. Did you know that Gibbs once made Chuck Norris cry? Yes, only once becuase Chuck Norris never made the mistake of upsetting Gibbs again.
17. Get a planner. It can only help you.
18. Sherlock Holmes is not a sociopath, contrary to popular belief.
19. Watson is a ladies man. No seriously... he sees a cute woman and he pounces...
20. You need to do the Fork in the Garbage Disposal.

Fork in the Garbage Disposal

Dear...

Dear CSI Miami people, I believe it would be in your best interest if your GSP tracking devices did not SAY THAT EXACTLY on them. I believe this could alert the people you are trying to track or tip off the bad guy who has your good guy.

Dear Christians, SHHHH don't speak. Grow a brain and then you shall be allowed. PS listen to God, not yourself. Also, using the Bible to support the Bible is stupid. Just all around.

Dear World, not every good friend ship is sexual. Period. No. Furthermore, it ruins the TV show and the suspense. You have to wonder. But then again some people are friends.

Dear Survey of Chemistry Teacher, I would prefer we cover major concepts in class rather than teaching imbeciles how to plug in numbers to simple equations that are self explanatory.

Dear Women of the World, no you need not get married. It's okay if you don't. More importantly you do not need to do it so early. Maybe you should see the world first and explore life. Be yourself and find out who YOU are.

Dear People, to play Sherlock Holmes in anything and be good you must: be looney and not eat a lot. No really, it's true.

Dearest Tutoring Services, I NEED A TUTOR NOW! Follow in JG Wentsworth's footsteps. People need their money and they need it now. I NEED A TUTOR AND I NEED  IT NOW!

Dearest Lizzi Child, I do not have the same tastes as Destiney, or anything remotely close other than the gender.

Dear Women, having a brain is fantastic, using it is even better! If you should marry someone, they should have done the same.

Dear College, no my parents aren't paying for me to attend here. Yes, it was through much hard work and scholarships and grants that I attend here. Yes, I am also in debt. So please do not tell me that I should get good grades, for 20K a year, I'm gonna try my hardest!

Dear Sherlock Holmes, WHY AM I NOT LIKE YOU! WHY ARE YOUR NOT REAL!

Dear Steven Moffat, why don't you come over here to America and change the face of TV forever.

Dear Food, we used to be such good friends. What has happened? Oh I remember, your full of preservatives and grossness so I won't eat you.

Dear Fruit and Yogurt, come live and grow in my yard so I can have a lifetime supply of awesomeness to eat.

Dear Psych, COME BACK ON TV!

Dearest Rib, I wish you would stay in your appropriate location as it would save me a lot of grief and pain.

Dear Rubik's Cube, you may have won this battle, but I will win the WAR! I will BEAT YOU!

Dear Boys Who Look Like and Dress Like Girls, no.

Dear Mickey the Pomeranian, stop biting me. It's not FUNNY.

Dear Self, why must you always wake up at 3AM. And sometimes remember things I have not done. (Such as possibly leaving one's window rolled down and having a MASSIVE STORM come and assault your car)

Dear America, WHY YOU NO WATCH SHERLOCK?

Dear Other College Students, some of these things we're learning are not so hard, most are generals. Plus, if you have to ask such stupid questions, you should NOT be a Nurse as one has to be able to utilize the brain... which you have proven you cannot do.

Dear Tumblr, STOP BEING SO ADDICTING. If I don't check you 50 times a day I feel empty inside.

Dear Pre-Labs, you are ridiculously hard and not really worth my time. But I have to search forever for the answers so my grade will stay good.

Dear Graders, if one gets a 91% on a test, don't you think its a bit much to write good job? I mean I know I'm awesome and the like, but how bad do others have to be doing that a barely A is a good job.

Dear Friends, where have you all gone?

Dear God, why can I not get this relationship thing!

Dear College Students Who Say They Know Who They Are and What They Want to Be, you will now epically fail at life becuase really you never know fully who you are and what you will do. Life gets in the way of plans and maybe God doesn't want you to do that. You will never be the same year to year. Your goals will change, so will jobs, friends and outlooks.

Combine Sherlock and Doctor Who in caption form? Brilliant.

Maybe Holmes and Watson were more than just friends. Watson's getting a little touchy here.

So think about it. We all know the phrase "No shit Sherlock," but what did Holmes get to say to people when they stated the obvious?

THIS IS THE BEST! Special dedication to Steph!

For more hilarious pictures you should check out my tumblr. the names louderthelife

Family vacation

Okay I know its so cliche, everyone hates family vacations. No, I loathe them and will never be going on one again. My sister seems to think I'm going to steal my mom's attention and love. She's constantly trying to beat me. I have something wrong, she has something MORE wrong. Same with injuries.

I did get some clothes. 6 shirts for 30 overall. yeah that is like $5 a shirt.

Didn't get much school work done like I had wanted and realized that driving can be boring.

I did miss home and really missed 'Nooga. But I would love to move out. But really, enough with the cliches.

You know when you don't want someone to same something becuase someone else int eh group doesn't know about it. You know like parties? Sherlock Holmes does it better by pretending to faint and creating a scene.

You need to spy on someone? Sherlock Holmes pretends to be engaged to the maid, who doesn't know its a lie.

Do you need to get someone out of the room? Send Lestrade to interrogate criminal while you leap over and try to find a secret compartment with the help of Watson. Then pretend like nothing happened and your bored...

Okay so why are all new songs written by guys for girls? I mean I want to sing them but I mean really? I would be singing to a girl.... -.-

Mounteagle.... where losing concentration for a moment means instant death.

Do you ever need to lay low to escape a criminal? pretend your dead and don't tell your best friend... whose wife dies soon after, leaving him alone.....

One point on Sherlock Holmes the person, other than the other rambles I just said. He needed Watson. What was once the guy who never had, or needed a friend; learns about friendship... okay let's not lie, he grew increasingly fond of Watson, potentially in a codependent way. But what can you do when your Bipolar...


Okay now on a scale of 1-10 how random was this? 1 being least and 10 being most....

Rest of the season coming soon!!!

Like a BAWSSSSS

....... expeiriment/idea

The world stood still as the EMTs swarmed the scene. They kept pushing me away, telling me I had to let go. They took over and put him up on the stretcher. That's when I hear it, "He's not breathing!" the buzz of paddles being charged mixes in with the chaos of the crowd.
It shouldn't have been him. This was all my idea! I told him to stay, not follow me. Oh, but he was ever so courageous and loyal, always looking out for me. My reckless behavior, the direct opposite of who he was. I had never considered the killer would go after those I care about. It never occurred to me that others would be harmed, never knew that another would pay the price for the risk I took.
It stopped. Nothing made sense. Why were they leaving him on the stretcher!? They need to save him!
Someone gently leads me to another ambulance. The EMTs check my vitals, shining lights in my eyes and asking em meaningless questions. Why weren't they saving him? The detective, our friend and confidant in all this, came over. He's speaking to me but I can't hear him, it's like I'm underwater. "Heart.....-ouldn't sav-....-oo lat-....."
I just stared. He spoke in slow motion.. "They couldn't save him. He's dead."
I felt like a train hit me. Those last words.... he's dead.... Then the world came rushing back. All the noises, the sirens, talking, talking talking, radios, it was all too much.
My world cracked. Reality hit. My best friend, come to think of it, he was really my only friend. i had aquiantances, but no one really close. Since childhood... gone. Forever. Never coming back....

Things that are more fun....

So I thought I should post about my trip to Nashville (which started a day later than planned).
Let me list things that are more fun and less stressful than this trip...

1. Somebody burning your forearm with a cigar.
2. A trip to the ER where you are the patient
3. Childbirth
4. Reading War and Peace in 12 hrs
5. Alligator attack
6. Listening to Rush Limbaugh
7. An emergency tracheotomy
8. A car crash
9. Watching disney channel ALL DAY
10. Chemistry class

Facebook

It starts out innocently enough,

you say, "I'm just gonna see if I have any updates!"

But once your on, leaving is tough.

You knew it would happen, you took the bait.

Now your on your secret crushes page,

analyzing ever comment they make.

When they flirt with someone else your enraged,

 you think, "ew, that person is SO fake!"

One hour later, your still chilling,

That paper you were writing? forgotten.

You continue to procrastinate, it's so easy, your willing

But now your eyes are starting to hurt and feel like cotton.

It's midnight, "WHAT?" let's face it, you haven't even started.

It's due tomorrow, so starts the mad rush.

It's time that you and your facebook parted.

Except for now, your brain is only mush.

Well oops, you did it again, facebook played with you heart

you got lost in the games

Well now its time for that kick start,

but wait, just let me look up a name...

This is facebook... its pretty much made out of magic..

Oh and don't forget youtube... you say to yourself "oh, only one funny thing!"

3HOURS LATER.....

*disclaimer: I don't own facebook and facebook makes it own money without me..... and same with youtube... but if I did I totally would be doing something other than this

Don't even bother reading this...

Okay so if you ARE reading this you actually bothered.... sorry to tell you that it probably will be a sad, angsty post.... really not even for your sake but more for my own...


The brisk night signals the approaching fall and eventual winter. The fields, once filled with rich amber reeds, are now coated by a deep caramel in the darkness. Clouds drift across this celestial sphere, ever so often hovering as if hesitant at what might be. The clouds sweep across the heavens and I can see the moon for a moment. Moonbeams illuminate the wheat, giving it a eerie golden aura. Several crows that were in the tall grass are suddenly spooked and fly off. The temperature has dropped along with the atmosphere's pressure, promising the soon arrival of the thundering warriors. The wind changes from a slight breeze to howling in the darkness and soon the moon is enveloped by the inky blanket, concealing the stars. The reeds bend and sway, dancing across the landscape.

The Most EMO POST IN ALL THE LAND!

Dear Diary: 

Mood: Apathetic. 

My life is spiralling downward. I couldn't get enough money to go to the Blood Red Romance and Suffocate me dry concert. It sucks 'cause they play some of my favorite songs like 'Stab My Heart Because I Love You' and 'Rip Apart My Soul' and of course, 'Stabby Rip Stab Stab'. And it doesn't help that I couldn't get my hair to do that flippy thingy. Like that guy from that band can do. Some days, you know... 

I'm an emo kid, non-conforming as can be 
You'd be non-conforming too if you looked just like me 
I have paint on my nails and make-up on my face 
I'm almost emo enough to start shaving my legs 
'Cause I feel real deep when I'm dressing in drag 
I call it freedom of expression, most just call me a fag 
'Cause our dudes look like chicks, and our chicks look like dykes 
'Cause emo is one step below transvestite! 

Stop my breathing and slit my throat 
I must be emo 
I don't jump around when I go to shows 
I must be emo 

I'm dark, and sensetive with low self-esteem 
The way I dress makes every day feel like Halloween 
I have no real problems but I like to make believe 
I stole my sister's mascara now I'm grounded for a week 
Sulking and writing poetry are my hobbies 
I can't get through a Hawthorne Heights album without sobbing 
Girls keep breaking up with me, it's never any fun 
They say they already have a pussy, they don't need another one 

Stop my breathing and slit my throat 
I must be emo 
I don't jump around when I go to shows 

[ From: http://www.metrolyrics.com/i-must-be-emo-lyrics-hollywood-undead.html ]

I must be emo 
Dye in my hair and polish on my toes 
I must be emo 
I play guitar and write suicide notes 
I must be emo 

My life is just a black abyss, you know, it's so dark. And it's suffocating me. Grabbing ahold of me and tightening its grip, tighter than a pair of my little sister's jeans... which look great on my by the way. 

When I get depressed I cut my wrists in every direction 
Hearing songs about getting dumped give me an erection 
I write in a live journal and wear thick rimmed glasses 
I told my friends I bleed black and cry during classes 
I'm just a bad, cheap imitation of goth 
You can read me "Catcher in the Rye," and watch me jack off 
I wear skin tight clothes while hating my life 
If I said I like girls, I'd only be half right! 

I look like I'm dead and dress like a homo 
I must be emo 
Screw XBox, I play old school Nintendo 
I must be emo 
I like to whine and hate my parentals 
I must be emo 
Me and my friends all look like clones 
I must be E-Mo 

My parents just don't get me, you know. They think I'm gay just because they saw me kiss a guy. Well, a couple guys. But I mean, it's the 2000s. Can't 2... or 4 dudes make-out with each other without being gay? I mean, chicks dig that kind of thing anyways. I don't know diary, sometimes I think you're the only one that gets me, you're my best friend... 

I feel like tacos


Go here to see it acted out! via stick people of course!

Not only...

Not only have I figured out that the world is my oyster and I can do anything, I have actually discovered a point to chemistry. Now if I could figure out how to create this chemical reactions and get my hands on some chemicals I could have some proper fun!
Things I have learned,

• Cooking spicy things (peppers) in frying pan can lead to burning sensation in tender skin and inside of nose.
• Lettuce wedges are indeed what they say and are both not a source of nutrition but also should not be ordered at all.
• There are several poisons that affect the acetycholinesterase and acetycholine receptors which in turn cause differing affects on the muscular systems ranging from spastic paralysis to flaccid paralysis, most often all are fatal to subject in high doses. Exmples are insecticides and curare. Also there is an autoimmune disease that attacks itself and causes flaccid paralysis too, called myasthenia gravis
• Interestingly enough some of the poisons can help treat diseases, if in low doses, such as a poison that inhibits acetycholinesterase can help stimulate muscle movement (if too much then there is spastic paralysis) and can be used to treat myasthenia gravis.
• Being a good person and being pretty has nothing to do with getting a boyfriend.
• I potentially have an arrogance problem.
• One cannot take the carotid pulse on both sides at same time as it will cause patient to pass out. This is often used in crime to keep people from screaming (such as "Shawn Takes a Shot in the Dark" on Psych) and/or cause them to pass out or die. Do not try at home, unless you are an evil criminal and then I'm calling the cops
• Tetanus is used to describe contraction of muscle fibers. Complete contraction is the real deal. People who get tetanus from the infection from a nuerotoxin will exibit signs first in the TMJ (tempromadibular joint) and thus the name "lockjaw." While mortality rates range from 50% to 75%, only 11% of reported cases have been fatal. Good news? This is preventable, so get the SHOT!!!!! Vaccines were created for a reason, not to kill you but to prevent your death!
• The potential of me enjoying the learning of all this? 100%

So I also, along with some friends, saw the fantastic Midori live. Let's just say the way a violin should be played is fully realized in her.
Studying on a Saturday night? yeah, I might be a loser, but I will be one with an A (fingers crossed).

Aw look, this is how much my other personalities care... :(

Yeah, that was good for your mind..... oh time travel, how you make things so much more interesting and possibly messed up.

Becuase we still have 3 more days of school til "break"

Sherlock cares not for your rules and regulations. He laughs at your compliance with social norms.

Even the great Sherlock Holmes chills on Sundays....

Yes maybe I am random, but  you know what? There are numerous scientific theories based on millions of random interactions. Which really poses the question in life... is anything ever truly random?

This week...

This week has been a crazy one for sure. Tonight I am off to see the world famous Midori in concert, but before that we will eat out at Mellow Mushroom.
Funny things said this week: the leading cause of homosexuality is being gay. as said in Developmental Psychology class.
So right now is obviously a time of growth, and not be cliche but it is for me too. I just realized that my life doesn't end if I don't become an NP, I can do whatever I want. I can write, draw, play music, learn new things, experience life!
I think I will try this National Novel Writing Month idea. It's what it sounds like, one writes a novel in one month. This translates to 50K words and if you finish they will print you your own copy of your book,

Um...I'm planning on giving a test on Wednesday (just before you go on break) over chapters 8&9.

The title is a legit email my class and I received from our teacher.... and that's why he's the best...


Saw Chinese Acrobats tonight... it's kinda like--> Avatar: The Last Airbender (animated series, not movie) + China + Asian awesomeness + Magic Flute + King and I + awesomeness to the nth degree + the intensity of the sun and that was what it was like... yeah...

Awesomeness

Sherlock (BBC) will be airing this October on PBS..  24 and 31 October and 7 November, at 9PM EST.

And rumor is that they will stream the episodes online in case you misses them on air...

Obligatory Sherlock Picture becuase my blog can't go for long with out one...

Just so you know... it will happen

In other news I'm trying out this writing a novel in one month thing(50K words)... its part of National Novel Writing Month.... It could be cool... or a fail... but whatever, it is worth a try... but what on earth will I write about....

An intense paragraph redone...

The moment stood still as Nick watched the bullet whizzed past him. His head turned just in time to watch as the bullet lodge in Connor's chest. Nick watched as Connor stumbled back a few steps, and look down at his torso. Connor lifted his head to meet eyes with Nick. Confusion and pain flashed across Connor's face as he fell to his knees and fell over.
 Nick looked up and saw the villain begin his escape and in that second Nick had to choose: catch the killer they had worked so hard to find or help his best friend. 
In a flurry Nick was at Connor's side. Wrenching his jacket off and pressing it firmly on the  crimson stain that was blossoming from Connor's chest. Whipping out his phone and calling 911, Nick began to reassure his friend that everything would be okay. Connor looked up at his childhood friend and smiled, but the pain betrayed him as it turned into a grimace. 
Nick didn't need a medical degree to know it was bad; although he applied pressure to the wound like all the actors on TV did,  blood still continued to pour out at an all too rapid pace. He heard the ambulance in the distance, and begged Connor to hold on. 
As Nick looked into the distance again, praying for the ambulance, Connor rasped out, "I....I don't think.. I'm going to make.. it this time man..." and attempted to smile. Nick looked directly into Connor's eyes and said in a serious voice, "No man, your going to make it, I know it... I can feel it in my gut."
Tears were streaming down Nicks face as he watched his best friend turn paler than any person should be. The breaths were short rasps, a battle for air. 
Connor looked at him and murmured, "I'm sorry..." with his last breath. A single tear rolled down Connor's face as his eyes closed and the darkness took hold.
When the EMTs arrived the found Nick cradling his best friend and begging him to come back and not leave him. The EMTs tried to tear him away and began to treat  Connor, but Nick knew it was all in vain. He knew, it was already too late.

In times like these we learn to not just survive but live....

The footprints in the snow suddenly ended and she knew then and there that she was a going to die out here. She was going to die here in the bleak and windy night, alone.
She stumbled, her coordination finally failing, and fell face first into the snow. With a grunt she turned her head to the side, but made not other attempt at movement. The wind was howling all around her, blowing ice crystals through the tundra like tiny shreds of glass.
This wasn't how she pictured dying. She expected to go out with a BANG! Saving a little boy, rescuing someone from a burning building, taking the bullet for some soul, anything but this. But really, isn't this how life goes, she thought to herself. She knew life wasn't fair, the good died young and evil prospered. However, she never thought she would be the victim, the youth that would die before their prime.
She couldn't feel her fingers, or most of her outer extremities for that matter. She giggled as the thought, whether it was from the hypothermia or her hysteria of knowing her end was near, she didn't know. She tried to move her hand to see if it was there. It took several painful tries but eventually she was able to fling her hand near enough to be in her range of vision. It was puffy and blue, and possibly black, though she couldn't tell in the eternally black night.
She thought it funny that she wasn't bothered by this, but that thought faded soon enough.
Her breathes were coming slower and slower, and her heart couldn't keep going for long. She briefly wondered what people would think when they found her, if they found her at all. No one knew where she was and it was unlikely they would find her after it stopped snowing.
She felt the darkness grab her firmly and pull her towards its' depths. Maybe it wasn't so bad, she thought, in the darkness there is no more cold or hurt. Her last thought before succumbing to the dark abyss was that she never really told her friends and family how much they meant to her, and it made her sad. The sadness quicly dissipated as unconsciousness took hold.
She lay in the ever deepening snow as the night went on.
No one would know she was gone until the next day and by then it was far too late. Her body was never found and her loved ones mourned, but eventually moved on but did not forget.
Years later she was an urban legend to warn kids and but a wisp of a memory.

my week... via im with cullen

in addition to have a thousand things em was a butt

i forgot to eat multiple times

ate soda and acandybar for one meal

ran to a concert, didnt know where my phone was and ran to find it in intermission

then ran back

had a A&P test

a chapel talk

when mink disection... the lab is from 12.30-3.30... i spent from 12.30-3.15 disecting and labeling the mink

then had to tae an exit quiz on human msucles

oh and thats not even the end of the day!

okay

so here it goes, then gparents are no where to be found picked up sis worked out for a bit, ran home and got her piano books, rushed her to piano rushed to chiropractor appt rushed home as sis did not answer phone she evinutally called and still needed to be piced up, rerouted and got her

missed my online class meeting

and had a test and presentation the next day

you want to hear a bout tuesday?

sure

ok

dont forget the last one was wednesday, and i woke up late and rushed out teh door always ominous

tuesday

wake up turns out have to take jess to school, rushed her over and nearly die multiple times trying to get to my class afterward

both tues and wed i forgot a jacet

went to class, then worked out, then went to southern connections which was not where it normally is, i called some1 5 min b4 class and i had to walk to another building downt he prominode, then had to go back to my car, go to the chiropractor then had to pick sis up, take her home, stayed there for 1.5ish hrs, halfway into that i forgot i had a quiz that night and i wouldnt be home til9 leaving me one hour for it and i still needed to watch the 1 hr lecture

watched half lecture then went back out at 3.30 to meeting for dev psych presentation to which em was a butt and i realized i had forgotten to eat

ate a bit during that meeting then went and met jeremy and bri and we studied for a&p

i had a sangria and a butterfinger for dinner

looked at watch and it was 7.29, concert @7.30

rushed over there in a hurry, ran inside and i was a smidge late

to ge teh credit i had to stay for whole thing.... realized i didnt have my phone, freaked during the concert, which halfway in i realized teh guy was playing a piano with his hand and feet

during intermission ran to find my phone, which i had not left where we were studying but it was in my car... ran back inside and worried aobut hte time

9.00, concert done

rush home

study for quiz

take it with 20 left

to find out it was open until 11.59...

thats quite a week

im sorry

on and monday must have been bad cuz i dont remmeber much

its okay, tis life

yesterday went like this

dev psych test, our presentation

oh you have to hear this (sorry this was a big week)

it comes my turn to talk and harrison tells me to take up 15 min, when i really only planned for 7-10

so im rambling

then harrison is like 5 MIN we have a game!

then i wrapped up the other half of the presentation in a quick manner, which i had already kinda messed up on the first half (forgot 1 slide for each idea)

so i looked silly

but then i went to my car and found out i didnt have my workout clothes

so i just went home and only went out to go to the chiropractor appt

and btw the chiropractor appt make me feel like sh** and sore

im sorry taylor

Oh man....

So the last few days have been no more than a blur of activity, with yesterday probably being the worst... Oh Friday how you should get here sooner....

I just wish it could be Friday and oh how I know that next week couldn't be this busy... That A&P test I may not have done so well on took up most of the early week as well as my Dev Psych presentation and chapel talk. Tired doesn't describe what I am. Not to mention the chiropractor, I hurt now more than ever, rather muscular pain. Which is supposed to happen as some muscles will have to work harder as they actually have to work now that the bone is realigned...

But that doesn't stop if from dragging me down and making me sore..... friends, I miss them, though many came today to listen to my chapel talk! YAY! Anyway today was crazy too as I was running late, had teh A&P test, then chem, which I left early to go do my chapel talk, then I went to lab where I spent all but 15 minutes of the class period dissecting that crazy mink who I think we should call Moriarty becuase of his evil! Then had 15 minutes to learn the muscles, and thank God I already knew them (THANK YOU MR. BEASLEY!) and aced that exit quiz. From there I had to pick up Jess from school (grandparents no where to be found) took her to work out with me, which was way shorter than normal but then we rushed home, got her piano books and rushed to her lesson. I then went and got gas, went to the chiropractor, which ran late. Grandparents sill not where to be found, Jess's lesson ended at 5.30, and my Chiropractic ended at 5.50, she didn't answer her phone so I started to go home, but I had to actually reroute and go 15-20 minutes out of my way to get her. By now it was 6.20 and we went home. 6.33... completely missed the Life and Teachings meeting... it counts towards your grade but I'm trying to fix that... Now I'm just tired and sore and well.... who knows...

Harrison, always the DIVA!

My crooked spine! Yeah that is why it looks bent!

Left is me, right is what it is supposed to be.... yes my is actually curved int he wrong direction

"What? How else am I going to Harvard?"

Fun Nights.... going to steal some knickers later if you want to come with!

FALL!!!! in the morning!

What the HELL are people doing in this bathroom!!??? Where else do you put it?

Good ol' Desert Storm....

Poison Ivy from the summer, this picture just doesn't quite capture the shock factor of how bad it was.

He takes after his father.... He's pretending to be my dad, we found him like this

Because IRON MAN ROCKZZ!!! BOBBY!

Well they did park "on the line"

He told me to take it and show my mom becuase she would laugh

Street performer!

Dude, My Face is CHAPPED

The crisp wind blows harshly against her skin. She's been walking outside for 5 minutes now and she begins to feel the hint of Jack Frost creeping into her bones. She doesn't mind though, she finds it all invigorating. The rush of the chill and the air racing into her lungs as she deeply inhales the fragrance of dead leaves. This exhilarating experience is repeated throughout the day as she wanders from location to location trying to finish her busy to-do list. But in those moments, she's free from all that. It's just her and the whispering wind.

But man my face is chapped.... gotta tell ya... and its just today that it started, but then agian this is probably one of the days I walked the most outside and also one of the windiest of the new fall season that has encompasses Tennessee.

How about a list? I haven't done one in forever!
What do I wonder about?

• what the blood spatter pattern would look like for a stab wound to the chest. also multiple.
• Can one cut through costal catilage when stabbing.
• Same as above but for rib.
• how long does it take for my blood to clot.
• what does my blood look like under the microscope. 
• same as above but with differing concentrations of Na added.
• what does my fat tissue look like and where is it in relation to my veins.
• why the differing amounts of blood between stab wound and gunshot would to heart. specifically in relation to how it affects the heart. (ie obliteration, split...)
• How can I get 2 ID card from college, specifically others so one can chill in a friends room without taking said friends key.
• ideas: "lose" card, get new one. somehow copy electronic strip code. "neutralize" old card and transfer new code to it also.
• get device that tries all possible combos to lock/hack system (shouldn't be too hard)
• I wonder if my dad will let me borrow his soldering iron and solder. (sp)
• where can I get a clip to hold things I solder? make one?
• can I ever figure out the combination to that padlock?
• Will I ever get to go back to New York?

And much more.... Pictures!

http://sadynax.livejournal.com/19176.html#cutid1

Loving this drawing style....

http://browse.deviantart.com/?qh=&section=&global=1&q=doodles#/d15sspd
Because this needs to happen all over your paper