How do you find the answer....

When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth...
-Sherlock Holmes, The Sign of the Four

Friday, August 13, 2010

I must rid this board of ANGST!

Well heres another blog post to Steph. Been tired this week from hangover of the Midterm to the realization of another longer essay next week. I await the loading of a Sherlock Holmes vid on youtube. I thought now was as good a time as any to write this.

As I get older things begin to change, even the career I want to go into. More schooling tacked onto that; however I never did nor do I ever wish to be a doctor instead of a nurse practioner. I choose the career path for a reason and it holds more economical logic than you'd think. But this blog is not here to prove anything to you so that really would be a waste of space.

As the days go by my quiz grades begin to drop. The combination of unfamiliar civilizations and less extra credit can be partially blamed. I begin to wonder though if its something I'm not doing right. I was acing those things up until a few days ago. There is only one more week, but oh will it count for it all.

I happened upon the only person on campus who cared that I wore earrings, the one person whom I gave my resume to. Fingers crossed for that job. I didn't get the blogging job, yet, somehow that doesn't surprise me. 

I begin to wonder if I really fit in at college, other than the friends I already have. How am I going to pay for it all?

The black fits sneak up on me now more than ever and leave just as quickly and I wonder if this is life. Is this all it really is? My deep urgency for a mission trip, something to help others in a simpler society increases two fold.

These are my thoughts and I apologize for the darker tone they have taken, but thats how I felt like writing. Maybe next time there will talks of all my favorite shows and how I still find Holmes funny but no one else does

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Night

Darkness approaching,
never knowing,
that one moment when it will hit.

The unknown is what we all fear,
the dreading, never knowing...
who will be near.

Are you there to help me?
is this even something you'll help with?
Do I have to beg or is something I've not done....

Is this cloud everlasting,
or will sun shine through this casting,
will I simply crumble on the floor?

I know you're there,
I you will help
But between me and you, I'm the problem

You know what's wrong?

I'm sitting here in my room pretty much spent from a day full of stress. Exhaustion claws at my inner being and the edges of my vision blur as the sandman calls me name. Deep inside my heart I feel a hole... maybe not so much a hole but a weariness left behind by one too many bad situations. Life seems to be full of these now, an endless struggle of a series of unfortunate events, highlighted by some things going my way. Money bleeds from my pores and my sweat is full of anxiety. The guitar, the piano, the music, who once drove this force away, are now outdated weapons in a war far to advanced for this young soldier.

What can I do? What can I say? Will really even matter anyway?

Frustration builds up and puts the world on  my shoulders. Am I being punished like Atlas by the gods?

Will it even get better from here on out or am I destined to work hard for the rest of my life for nothing?

History, oh how you were what we are. Destined are the modern people to repeat you. Wars upon wars about nothing more than a simply feud no one remembers. Work upon work for the weary so the wealthy can have their dues. Plenty having it all come easy, the rest breaking their backs to get by. History, O History. You continue on, continuity being your game and all the world the stage. We each have out parts and we each play our roles and we all fall down at one time or another. The stage falls down and nothing is left around and all you can see is........ nothing.....

Friday, August 6, 2010

So... there's this guy named Mickey and.......

Well, there is a a guy named Mickey and my mom and sis think he's perfect for me and now we have a date... probably is I don't much care for him... or he's species.... Okay Mickey happens to be a dog... but then again I couldn't resist.

I really don't care so much for dogs, but I find them irresistibly cute. Dogs as a whole are stinky, slobbery, and needy as all get out. Dogs also are just not as cute or soft and like cats. Cats are awesome in the fact that they just leave ya be, unless you wish to chill with them. Its really a thing with people too. Most who own one or the other are not too fond of the other.

I have applied to at least 3 jobs, and I'm going to have to try and apply at Wal-mart, Bi-lo and the like. Its gonna be peanuts for how much time I'll spend there. College is a full time job. I don't understand how people do it and work.

Anyway heres to the class that is kicking me while I'm down. For real, the midterm might kill me on its own.

In non school and work related things I... wait this is going to be about that... either way eating costs a ton of money, especially when you leave home and don't come back til 8. Who knew....

I miss reading!

RANDOM PHOTO TIME... they will be random so there!






 Go see

And so Steph can't say I don't blog, even tho she is the only one who reads it.

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Writing sample for School

Prompt: How I Came to be at Southern?

In a small town, nested in a corner of East Tennessee is where our story all starts. A young girl embarks on journey of life 18 years ago as she's born at the local hospital....... Well, that was a little "pie in the sky" as my comp teacher once said. Well, let's get on with this story in a more realistic way.

It did start out in a small town, in my defense. I was born and bred in Collegedale, TN. I went to Cradle Roll, Spalding, CA, the whole nine yards, and naturally the next step in the Collegedale Adventist system,(if you're not going to be a missionary) is to attend Southern. That was essentially the start of why I wanted to attend. It was "just what you did." However, as I got older, learned the value of money and did some inclusive discovery, I began to realize that to do something "just because" was not enough. (especially at Southerns costs)

Over the years I had mulled over the careers I would like to do and Nursing just always came up. Now don't get me wrong I had my phases. I wanted to be (like everyone at one point) a musician, an artist, a detective, and a paleontologist (don't even get me started on dinosaurs, I must have watched every Jurassic Park movie like 5 times, in addition to reading the books). I had visited the hospital a few times in my day (kidney stones will do that to you) and I enjoyed the atmosphere. Well, not necessarily with me a patient (kidney stones= NOT FUN), but rather I would like to work there. My mother is a nurse and basically threw metaphorical wood onto my metaphorical fire called nursing. I had always loved medical shows, everything form House to Mystery Diagnosis, as many do. However, I could see myself doing stuff like that and enjoying it thoroughly.

My love for all things medical is an all encompassing aspect of my personalty. I even loved learning bones and muscles in A&P class (how odd is that?!). The doctor career path was thrown out the window as that is expensive, a lot school and it just wasn't what I wanted to do. I wanted to have more patient interaction, but also more time to have with my family and friends (doctors don't get that as much). Southern is a great school for Nursing, so I put a proverbial coin in the scale for SAU.

I think one of the more important reasons I wanted to attend SAU was, and still is, the privilege to attend school with peers who share my same beliefs (so we can discuss them) and to have teachers who genuinely care about me succeeding in this life and eternally. As a naturally outgoing person, making friends is as essential as eating to me, and as my beliefs are a big part of me I wanted to be able to share that part of myself with others without fear of confrontations or exclusion. I also wanted a place that would allow my faith to flourish so I would be prepared to share it with others. More coins for SAU on the proverbial scale!

There are also all the help and activities Southern offers as compared to other schools, and they are things I would love to perticipate in. At other school there are sorieties and other organizations, but that's just not me. The things SAU offers are aimed at what I want to do, especially spiritaully (which you're not going to find many other places.

Let me tell you a little about the atmosphere that I love. Over the years I have grown to love the little Collegedale community and the school systems here. The fact that I can walk into the VM and see at least 3 people I know is just something that I love. This close knit community has stolen my heart a little, not to mention the South in general. I absolutely love the beautiful nature around here and all the "country-ness." Also, don't tell anyone, I LOVE country music. The good stuff though. I don't know how to describe how much I love it here. One more coin for Southern!

One thing I really, really wanted, and still want to do, is do mission work. Where better than a school of my religion that offers tons of opportunities to do just that. I can help my local community and share my faith in an organized way. I can also go to a far away country and minister in a new way I have never experienced. This is also one reason I choose my career as I could mission to people and heal them.

So it was decided that I wanted to attend for my own reasons and not just to go with the flow. I filled out the forms and took the leap. I studied and worked hard on getting scholarships and grants and, as of today, I have most of my first year at SAU paid for.

You may wonder where God was in the entire process, well the answer is He was there, hopefully guiding me. I'm still open to ideas obviously if He tells me to do something different;however, I think this is where I'm supposed to be right now.

This is how I came to be here at Southern, enjoying the rigorious Smart Start. And so far, I'm convinced this was the right choice.

Monday, August 2, 2010

Obligatory post for Steph.... more soon to come when there is not a student orientation...

So after I just wrote my longest blog post title yet, I will write probably the shortest blog post I have ever written...
  • So in the news this week: Shark Week for the win is happening this very moment on the Discovery channel, and guess who has a his own segment on it!? Craig Ferguson that is who!
  • Furthermore, I might get a job writing blogs for my college, i just have to create a sample blog for them.... ie this is not it... I tried to get other jobs too, so far 2 other places... next I will try Bilo and Walmart. If push comes to shove I will work at Micky Ds... if I'm desperate.
  • I have watched some of the shows I like since I started college, a huge feat I assureyou (both). One being White Collar, and the other Psych! which is hilarious in a freaking awesome sense!
  • I sit here int eh school library til me and Steph get to go to Lauren's dorm and chill, then we're off to some scavernger hunt.... a feat I do not look forward to as it is still hot and humid outside. Plus I stress enough about the homework, I don't need to freak out over a scavenger hunt, unless there's some money involved.
  • Finished an anotated bibliography... yeah I didn't know what it meant either but I did it anyway.
  • I will soon go to freerice.com
  • Aztecs really give a new meaning to the phrase "I will cut you"
  • I can't really think of anything else to say. This was  just to satisfy Steph... 
  • I will write a blog about college and the sample blog... till then... go watch Craig Ferguson and have a great time.

Friday, July 23, 2010

I haven't posted in a while.....

I was planning to post way earlier but I just didn't take initiative to do it... then the days went crazy and I didn't have time. So I thought that I would just do it.

Still laugh at Craig Ferguson, a recent episode was about as funny as ever.

Mom went to hospital, presenting with chest pain/ pressure. I stayed with her the whole time, which was overnight and well into the next day. Her labs and stress test show that the problems were not heart related.
There were 2 GSW taken to the ER causing the hospital to go on full lock down. I almost didn't make it back from the candy run, at which I saw a ton of police. First was to the head, possibly self-inflicted.

Finally am in SAU, however still have to turn in a form (I swear someone must have lost it, but whatever, no harm done). Will I EVER?!

Got contacts and have almost mastered them; however, my eyes continue to experience dryness, whether or not this is normal is still to be determined.

Start first college class next week and am almost all ready. One book needs to still come in the mail. Oh well. Maybe it will come on Monday or something, I think I can allegedly track it with UPS code.

I think I overheated and just got overtired today as I seemed to feel as though I might die around 4.

Hung out with Steph this week. Which is the best! I haven't hung out with her as much in recent years, but were still like on the same wave length and have a fabulous time together, well as least I do. She's so much fun, probably cuz we both laugh at and enjoy the same things.

Saw first Star Trek movie which was tons of epic pans to chow space and the Enterprise Though it was funny and really good. Crystal jumped and made noises the whole time. We told her Spock doesn't show his emotions, to which every time Spock did she pointed it out. Spock really just doesn't control his emotions as much as he would like people to think. Steph stated that Kirk looked like a younger version of the Priceline guy.... that's because he is, the one and only William Shatner. Hilarious moment.

I think there should be some pics now...
RDJ and Jude Law....

Loker from Lie to Me...


Steph, what do u think?

Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar?